Thursday, September 10, 2009

How NOT To Start Picture Day

You help everybody get their clothes out the night before School Picture Day. You wake them up 35 minutes before bus time, thinking that will be plenty of time since it usually only takes them 15 minutes to get ready (and they eat breakfast at school). You think that everything is going to go smoothly this year. Right?


I don't remember what order this happened in, but here it is.

-Ally scrambles through the dryer to find her volleyball uniform (which she needed last night and again tonight) and 2 pink monkey socks she borrowed from somebody at school yesterday.

-Cy decides to sleep in until TEN MINUTES BEFORE BUS TIME because, after all, what is the logic of waking up early or even on time? May I also point out that this young man wakes up at dawn on every summer day and every Saturday throughout the school year.

-Shae burnt her chin on a s'more (some sort of marshmallow explosion) the other night, so I squeeze a small blob of concealer on my index finger to help cover the scar.

-Paige and Shae are worried that now their dresses are going to be too cold because it's foggy outside. I reassure them that the forecast is still warm and that their jackets are in their bookbags.

-Paige points out that "When we walk down to the bus, it will be like we're walking in clouds, Mama!" I smile inside at her sweetness and say, "That's right, honey."

-Ally declares that her shorts are too short. Her brand-new shorts that she picked out from Farm & Fleet two weeks ago. The same shorts she picked out to wear last night and asked my opinion on the top to go with them.

-I'm curling Shae's bangs (How many years will I make this pathetic attempt to do hair?) and Ally exclaims, "Hey!! Those are MY socks!!" to Shae.

-Shae bursts into tears and runs away to hide.

-I calmly admonish Ally for taking that tone (which wasn't that bad, really; I can't call it yelling) and remind her that it's my fault for putting her socks in the twins' return laundry basket.

-I yell for Shae to come out wherever you are while I run upstairs to check on Cy who is STILL sleeping.

-A bit more yelling on my part.

-Ally decides to change into longer capri shorts.

-I grab a new pair of socks for Shae and tell her so while Paige and I go looking for her.

-Ally complains that I didn't wake them up early enough.

-Cy comes downstairs buttoning his shirt and wearing his crappy old ripped-up jeans from his "old clothes" stash in the closet. Because one new pair of jeans and one new pair of shorts are just not going to cut it with this outfit. (Did I mention he's wearing a too-tight white dress shirt under a white vest with a navy blue tie?)

-More yelling on my part. Something to the effect of the bus being here any minute, Shae come out and get on your shoes and socks, and Cy why can't you wear a dressier looking pair of jeans or shorts like we picked out last night. I don't know; it was all a blur.

-I brush Paige's hair and discover that she had syrup for breakfast yesterday at school. (No, we didn't bathe last night. We did that the night before last, to be ahead of schedule, you know?)

-I run upstairs to grab Cy a better pair of pants or shorts. I grab his dress shorts, trying not to mess them with the blob of make-up that is still on my finger.

-I find Shae in the vanity room closet. She won't come out till Ally leaves the room.

-Ally has me fix her hair a bit and I tell her to say she's sorry to Shae. My eldest complies.

-I go check on Cy's progress. He wants to know where his crappy old Adidas shoes are...I have no idea. I produce his brand-new pair of Nikes and ask what is wrong with wearing his new school shoes versus old ones. He seems to be bent on dressing up on the top and down on the bottom. ??

-Meanwhile, Shae has wondered upstairs for some reason. She is still weepy and inconsolable. I try to encourage her but I think she can detect some anger in my tone as I yell back at Cy, "Hurry up!! I am NOT driving anybody to freakin' school if you miss the freakin' bus!!"

-I kiss Paige good-bye and yell out the door to Ally to have a good day. The bus is thankfully about two minutes late, it seems.

-Shae somehow manages to calm down enough to let me apply a bit of concealer to her quivering chin. She didn't need the make-up, in my opinion, but I promised her last night that by golly, we'd make sure nobody could see that marshmallow burn.

-Cy decides to indulge me in changing out of the ripped-up jeans. He finds a new pair of jeans (because why wear the shorts that Mom has already laid out for you? It has to be your OWN idea, right pal?)and jumps into them as I tie Shae's shoes and kiss her good-bye.

-Cy is still angry about having to wear his Nikes instead of his old Adidas. Poor thing. He gallops down the driveway, into the fog, shoes untied and shirt buttoned crooked. I holler down to him about the buttoning error (probably shouldn't have done that, but it was a knee-jerk reaction) and end with a slightly sarcastic, slightly positive "Have a good day!"

And just think... next year there will be a preschooler to add to the mix! I can hardly wait.

Be still and know that I am God. --Psalm 46:10


Blogger Astrid said...

LOL! I wouldn't have guessed it...I helped out this morning with picture day and they all looked great! How did you manage to talk Cy into wearing a tie????? The twins were super cute... :)

September 10, 2009 at 10:51 AM  
Blogger Amy said...

Ha! Cy wears pretty much whatever he wants was HIS idea to wear the tie. He has odd combinations for clothes. I considered getting him into a decent pair of jeans my small victory. Meanwhile his dad says, "Why did you let him wear that?" like I can wrestle a 90-pound strong-willed boy into an outfit his mom picked out for him.!

September 10, 2009 at 7:38 PM  

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